Adventures in Craigslisting, Part 5: The Sob Story

I received the following email the day that I put up the ad for my car:

From: [Cry Baby]
Subject: 1997 Pontiac Grand Am - $500 (Brookside)
i am very interested in your car for a friend of mine that is going though a really bad time right now. She has no money, just totaled the only car they have. She has 2 children one with health problems and they frequently have doctors appointments. I am going to try and help her with getting some kind of transportation. I myself have had a hard time this past few months and really dont have much to help out, but i can do the work on the car, and i can probably come up with about $200 maybe $300 and i will see if she can come up with the rest. She is stuck here in missouri without family or friends.

Unfortunately, the area of my brain that is supposed to feel sympathy is currently occupied (and has been for the past fifteen years or so) admiring round, jiggly boobs. [Links provided for your viewing pleasure.] I guess it makes me an asshole, but I just don't care about the poor, helpless, lonely, single-mother-of-two friend to some also-down-on-his-luck guy who I don't know, who has poor grammar. I put my car up on Craigslist; I didn't give it to the Salvation Army. Sorry.