Friday, July 04, 2008

Adventures in Craigslisting, Part 2: The Jealous Boyfriend

This one is really just an extension of the previous post about Craigslisters asking very difficult questions. It starts out the same, with a brief message requesting me to call them, despite the precedent and ease of electronic communication:

From: [Female Name]
Subject: Car
please call me at [redacted],thank you.
As with the previous set of requests, I called this person hoping that perhaps her questions were so detailed that they could not be answered over such an impersonal medium as email.

When the other end picked up, this is (roughly) the conversation that followed:

Male Voice: Hello?

McBastard: Hello, my name is [Cynical McBastard]. Is [Female Name] available?

MV: What's this about?

McB: [Female name] had contacted me about the car that I'm selling. Is she available?

MV: (suspiciously) How do you know her?

McB: I don't. She just gave me this number to call.

MV: (still suspicious) Do you work with her...? I mean, how does she know you?

McB: We don't know each other. She replied to an ad I have up for a car for sale.

MV: (as if he's caught me in a lie) So, how did you get this number?

McB: (annoyed) She emailed it to me. Is she available or not?

MV: Hold on. (fumbling with the phone) This is my phone. So, wait, she was going to buy your car?

McB: (perturbed) I don't know; that's what I'm calling about. Is she there?

MV: Now hold on. Maybe it was me who emailed you. [Female Name] is my girlfriend, but I buy old cars from time to time.

McB: (completely without patience) So, are you interested in buying a car or not? I really don't understand the problem here.

MV: (scoldingly) Now you listen here!...

At that point, I had had enough of the jealous boyfriend and I wasn't about to let him scold me for being fed up with his jackassery. I hung up.

Jealous Boyfriend called back immediately, but I didn't pick up. He left a message, though, and I wish I'd kept it. To the best of my memory, it went something like this:

I don't know what the hell your problem is. You got a real attitude problem. I am just trying to find out the situation with this car and you keep talking about [Female Name]. I don't know who you are ... who you think you are, but you're not going to sell anything talking to people like that. I just wanted to find out if this was a car I wanted to buy and you got a real attitude. So, to hell with you. Good luck trying to sell your car, buddy!

He was right about one thing: I wasn't going to sell anything.


  1. We should call him back once you're all cracked out on Sparks.

  2. for reasons just such as this, i will some day donate my vast fortunes for the research and development of phone spiders

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