Monday, June 28, 2004

Good Quote from Last Night

We're trying to have a civilized conversation here about brain-eating zombies, and you interrupt with this nonsense about mummy boners!

Saturday, June 26, 2004

Good Intentions

I've found that people with good intentions often have the most devestating effect on one's self-esteem.

Odd Man Out

I'm getting fucking excellent at playing the part of odd man out.

Sunday, June 20, 2004

Selections from the China Palace Carry Out Menu

Seafood Combination
Shrimp invites inmitation crabmeat and scallops wearing colorful vegetable dresses to a velvet white wine sauce party.

Moo Goo Gai Pan
Moo Goo in Chinese means mushrooms and Gai Pan means chicken slices. Cooked with colorful vegetables in white sauce. Hey, you special Chinese too...

Shrimp with Garlic Sauce
Thin cut of celeries, carrots, whater chestnuts, and wood ears tossed with shrimp in spicey garlic sauce. It's good enough that you won't then your friend kisses you.

Saturday, June 19, 2004


Nic-O-Bob, I took a vicodin earlier today and I felt like I was moving underwater. I thought you'd enjoy that.

Tuesday, June 15, 2004

Quote of the Day

"Man, I missed everything today."

"Yeah, the president came over . . . ."
--Cynical McBastard

"And then the Pope came over and turned our wine into Jesus."

Saturday, June 12, 2004

Seven Minutes

i am your slow suicide, a cheap thrill, a five-minute diversion. i burned your eyes and clogged your throat, and we liked it. i was your last half-smoked cigarette that you ground into the dirt under your heel. my light has gone out prematurely, but it's probably oll for the best, seeing as i would have taken seven more minutes off your life if you had inhaled all of me.

Friday, June 11, 2004

Sometimes I Wish I Would Never Have to Apologize Again

I know I'm not perfect, and I know nobody expects me to be that way, but it would be nice if I wasn't such a fuck-up all the time. But pity isn't for me. Pity is for the people whose birthdays are forgotten by those they thought cared.

Friday, June 04, 2004

Email from My Brother

Dude, I just had the weirdest dream. I think you should punch my subconscious mind next time you see him, because he came up with this: Cynical McSister and Cynical McFriend and I attended your 'coming out' party at a club in New York. It was very surreal. McSister was a little girl, like 7 instead of 20, and McFriend never spoke a word, I don't think. He just followed us like some mute bodyguard. Oh yeah, and Cynical McDog was in the dream, too. It ended with this big dance number on the stairs to the upper level of the club. They had a spotlight on you and you were wrapped only a giant lavender feather boa and singing about how great you felt to finally share with the world that you were gay.

Oh god, I'm don't think I've ever had that fucked up of a dream, have you? I'm still laughing so hard I can barely hold my cup of coffee. I don't know what the hell triggered that dream.

Last night I watched Kenneth Branagh's version of Frankenstein with Robert DeNiro as the monster. Have you ever seen that one? It was pretty good, actually. Later,

Cynical McBrother

Circa Now