Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Shrug

It was late for a visitor, but, nevertheless, Thomas answered the door. Miranda stood at the doorway smiling. He half-heartedly smiled back and invited her into his apartment. "I just came over to see how you're doing," she said. "You seemed pretty upset earlier today."

"Yeah, well, I guess I was," he replied. He walked over to the couch and plopped down. On the coffee table in front of him there was a glass of ice and a bottle of whiskey. Thomas filled the glass halfway. He stood up and walked to his kitchen saying, "Do you want a drink?" along the way.

Miranda declined and sat down on the couch waiting for Thomas to return. "Do you want to talk about anything?" she asked.

Thomas strolled out of the kitchen. "Like what?"

"Well, you haven't said much in the past few days. And today you seemed upset about something."

Thomas shrugged.

"The other night, the woman with the long arm... You... I mean, it must..."

Thomas waited for a complete sentence.

"You killed her. I mean, it was an accident, but you killed her. That's got to be tough to deal with. You don't want to talk about it?"

Thomas was nonchalant as he took a sip from his glass. He stared at the corner of the room for a moment. "It wasn't an accident."

"What?"

"It wasn't an accident. I meant to kill her."

"It was just the heat of the moment," Miranda reassured him. "You were just protecting me, protecting us."

"There was that. But also, I didn't want to just stop her. I wanted to kill her," Thomas said matter-of-factly. He looked at Miranda. Her eyebrows furled. She looked confused. "She would have killed us or someone else if given the chance. I felt bad about it at the time, and for a little while after, but I don't feel like I should regret it anymore. I killed her."

Miranda was not prepared to comfort someone who did not feel remorseful. She did feel sorry for Thomas, though. It showed on her face.

But Thomas resented her pity. "And I don't feel bad about what I did tonight," slipped out, perhaps because of the alcohol swirling through his veins.

"What did you do?"

"I got rid of a real evil that has been plaguing New City." Miranda waited for more facts. "I got rid of a crime boss and a murderer. I killed Harry "The Hammer" Kwan!" Thomas spilled some of his drink in his excitement.

"You killed him?" Miranda asked in disbelief. Thomas nodded. "But why?"

"Because he was a crime boss and a murderer," Thomas repeated.

Miranda stood up. "But you can't just go around killing people!"

"Why not? He did."

"But that's what makes us different for them. We stop crimes; we don't commit them," Miranda said.

"But how many crimes did I stop by committing just one?"

"You can't kill whoever you want, whenever you feel like it," Miranda said. She looked as thought she might cry. "It's just wrong."

Thomas shrugged and looked away. Miranda felt her chest tighten and her throat swell up. Her eyes burned. She was upset with Thomas's indifference. And disappointed.

The room was silent for a few moments. Then Miranda said, "I'm going to go." Thomas stood and turned to see her to the door, but she was already there, leaving.

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